Knitting Days: Tinking

The word "tink" is the word "knit" spelled backwards. It's what you do when you need to go back a bit (or a lot), but not actually scrap the whole project. When you scrap the whole project, fyi, it's called frogging. I do not know the why of that one. 

There's been a lot of tinking going on around here. Everything's going backwards. I'm still slogging. Stuck in a rough flare-up that seems to have no end in sight. I'm sure it will end, they always do.

Look how pretty! 

 But when you realize that you need to go backwards for five whole rounds (180 stitches each + bonus: cables), you feel like giving in on the whole damn thing. I love this sweater and think it is coming along rather swimmingly. Then there is that sudden realization that I missed a cable row five rows ago, and boom I don't want to even think about the sweater, I hate the sweater!

The hard truth in knitting is that you can't move forward until you've gone backwards and fixed the mistake. So last night I did tink back those five rounds, even though I did truly just want to throw the sweater in a box and never look at it again. I'm still a little mad at it (even though, yes, it was my own fault because it was the sweater's fault), so I'm not really knitting away on it today like I might have otherwise. But at least I don't have to go backwards any more, even if I'm not moving too far forwards. 

What I'm trying to say, in case you missed my ever-so-subtle undertones, is that I'm stuck. I'm stuck in a flare-up and everything I'm used to doing isn't really on the menu these days. Making pudding turned into a disaster that left my whole body aching, and me crying. Pudding should never end in tears.  So all I can do is try to not get worse, until I can start taking steps to getting better. 

My solution? Star Trek: The Original Series and juice. I'm letting Captain Kirk handle my worries for the rest of the day, and drinking juice freshly pressed from my brand new juicer. And I'm taking a break from knitting.  Hopefully I'll be calm enough to pick it back up in a few days and start moving forward.

Happy tinking, happy resting, and happy knitting!

Fibro days: Slogging

I don't have the energy for a High Five for Friday. I can't even remember what I did this week, and the only pictures I've taken were of my hair, which I've finally managed to put up with hair sticks. It doesn't even look that good, but hey, I did it! Which leads to today's topic: Slogging.

You and me both, Kate.

I think my least favorite kind of fibro day is the one where you feel like you're pushing through jello to move. Sure, sure, the pain is bad and the cognitive difficulties are bad too, but this...this slogging really gets my goat. Today, as with yesterday, my issue is energy. Ever since coming down with a cold two weeks ago, I've had no energy. I feel, today, for the first time like I have no traces of cold virus left. But my body, I guess, still has to recover from all the effort of trying to make my immune system function. And it sucks.

Slogging, to me,  is when you have brain power, and you can think about all the things you want to do, but you cannot do them. Perhaps, if I was not being mindful of my body, I would go ahead and do these things, thinking that because I am not in a lot of pain, I am having a good day. Tomorrow, or the next day, I'd find myself in the midst of a massive flare-up, where low energy would be the least of my problems. I am, instead, being mindful. And it sucks.


When I'm feeling okay, I break things down into activities that are low-energy, medium-energy or high-energy. I try to time myself to only ten minutes at a time of high-energy activities (like cleaning the kitchen,  sewing, or taking a walk). Medium energy activities (drawing, writing letters/postcards, menu planning) get 20 minutes or so. Low energy activities (reading, knitting, watching tv) get 30-45 minutes. It's important to break even those up, so that I can adjust my posture, stretch a little, etc...

Most of these things are things that I enjoy. I look forward to them. And on days like today, every single one of them feels like a chore. Low-energy activities become medium-energy activities, and medium-energy activities become high-energy activities, and I can't even fathom the high-energy ones. Slogging days like today can break a person, make a person feel like absolutely nothing is possible. One right after the other can make you feel like you're stuck in this forever.

I did, technically, have my own photos for this post, but
photobucked flipped a biscuit this afternoon. Sorry.

I'm trying to get through my slogging days by going even slower than I usually do. It feels just the tiniest bit like torture, but hopefully my body will thank me for not pushing it before it was ready to go. And maybe, just maybe, tomorrow will involve just a little bit less slog, and a little bit more fun.

How do you slog?